It's a simple love.

You know how as you're growing up you hear [all the big] people say things like...

"If only I'd known then, what I know now..."

"If I would have figured this out ten years ago..."

"If I could go back in time, I'd tell myself..."

Etc.
Etc.
Etc.

I don't know about you, but I never wanted to be one of those people. Well, maybe I do know about you. I don't think anyone grows up wanting to be someone who looks back on their past with remorse, regret, discouragement. If you're anything like me [and really you probably are] you grew up telling yourself things like,

"I know what I'm doing..."

"I already know who I am..."

"Yeah but I really know what I want..."

Etc.
Etc.
Etc.
You know what I'm talking about. You know it because it's biologically and scientifically and naturally instilled in us all as human beings. Fact.

Here's the catch. I think there's a huge part of it ["it" being this crazy little thing called life] that some of us forget. Or rather, some of us just don't realize. Or rather, some of us just don't let ourselves have the opportunity to realize. Or rather, just kidding.

Our first day in Seattle [Levi and I's first day in Seattle, in case you haven't yet picked up on this being our story], as we walked through the Farmers Market we stopped for a minute at a certain lookout point to watch the ferries crossing to Bainbridge Island. He stole my camera and snapped shot after shot of me [and my blushing cheeks]. After a few quiet moments he must have gotten one he liked, because in one fell swoop [which phrase I've never understood] he hung the strap back on my shoulder, followed it with that hand down to the small of my back, pulled me against him, used his other hand to tilt my head upward and pressed his lips gently but securely against mine. Before I even knew what happened. The boy literally, took my breath away.

Sound like a scene from a movie? Trust me, I know. But THAT, is exactly my point. I know there are many a perfect first kiss stories out there, but I sure as heck had never had one. Sometime during that day I made the connection. I realized that being with him, strolling hand in hand down those city streets laughing and talking and sipping hot cocoa and dreaming, it wasn't forced. That moment I won't have to look back on with the woulda-coulda-shoulda-blues because instead of trying to make my life something it wasn't, I was just loving what it was. And that moment I didn't have to tell myself "I knew what I was doing" because I was finally accepting that I didn't. What could be simpler than that?

Those first days with Levi were the first in a long time that I'd want to live over and over and over. And guess what? That hasn't changed. This morning as I was leaving the house to go to work Levi rolled over, opened his eyes halfway and gave me the cutest half-awake smile I've ever seen. It said, "There ain't no way I'm awake enough to form any competent words right now but I loved sleeping next to you last night and I hope you have a great day with your kids. I'll be counting down the minutes until you get home!" I would give anything to go back in time, press pause, and just enjoy that tiny moment again and again because it's those moments that remind me [daily] that life just really isn't that complicated. In fact, it's really simple. Being really happy, doesn't need excuses or reasoning. Being really happy happens when you learn to just live and let live. And, of course, since this is a love story, it certainly doesn't hurt to find the person who fills the part of you that you didn't know was missing.

It certainly helped me.

Today is Friday [Payday for me, Cheers!]! Levi sold my violin for me this morning, finally. I'm so glad that lady wanted it. That thing had been sitting in closets and attics and dark, creaky bedrooms for far too long - that's no life for an instrument that could be doing this. [I think that kid is amazing. If you didn't click on that link, just do it. Party pooper.] I brought Costa Vida home and we ate some of that together while we talked about our days. Now we're listening to the Suns game and hoping desperately that we keep up with our lead!